Shocking Self Defense Rules for Women

5 Shocking Rules for Women’s Self Defense should you need to go physical. Because – let’s face it, ladies– talk and empathy aren’t always saving graces.

(1) Unless you’re a prize fighter, don’t trade punches with a dude. That’s playing into his game and wholly unwise. If you get clocked real good and knocked out, it’s awfully hard to fight back. (Said wryly.)

(2) Never just smush your elbow into an aggressors face. This isn’t kissy face- its smashy face. Whip-crack that elbow, smash it hard into the nose, throat, neck. To get free, you’ll need to put a hurting on a fella. Ditch the icky-poo feeling!

(3) As part of your goal, especially in opening moves, aim to shock his nervous system and consciousness, using surprise and speed. Be the hand grenade that goes off INTO your target. This will buy you a second or more to continue then escape.

(4) In close range assaults, for example, an upright pin, BE the “animal” not the pleading terrified woman. (Send her out for a drink.) Choose smart timing. Are his hands busy at your boobs? The good news is that you know where his hands are– so counterattack straight away. Zero to one hundred percent into a vulnerable face / throat or head target. Consider shredding and ripping- eyes nose lips face- and even biting and letting loose loud guttural animal sounds right into his ear. In other words: Go Primal. A ten pound monkey can shred a man’s face in seconds. Grab and torque the head; crack and use ears to crank the head around or slam it into a hard surface. Unleash yourself in order to escape. This is “defensive counterattack.”

(5) Get with the power of coiling and springing. Example, if you’re lying down (or in an upright pin position) and you can free your hands and engage the power of your hips…Spring It! Release like a coiled cobra. Don’t waste precious time pounding on he-mans’ chest. (That’s why Tarzan pounds his chest; it doesn’t really hurt.) Be a jack-in-the-box…on steroids! Open with a shock to the system that you can continue to capitalize on.

Remember, the goal is escape. Every situation is different and ONLY YOU can make the decision to resist or not. But if you do, abide by reality, not wishful thinking. Exploit smart timing and stay focused on what you need to do in order to escape. Then do it.

One final note for the uninitiated: Let me assure you. Scary as it may sound, this fierce fighting capacity already exists within you. It may be dormant or buried, covered over by layers of fear or socialization or by doubts and internal conflict about the use of force, or by social conditioning that keeps women tied to their fears of men and their powers.

It needs to be awakened, turned back ON and called out of hiding – which is part of my job.  Ultimately only you can give yourself permission to do what may otherwise be unthinkable.  But understand: this is nothing new.

Back in prehistory, say 40,000 years ago we coddled our young one minute then speared marauding bears the next. Our aggressive and nurturing natures seamlessly entwined. In other words, this power pre-exists in much the same way that fire lies dormant in a matchbox– until the first strike.

PMBMel2(1)new

Five Fierce Rules For Fight-Back Self Defense

Let’s Call it What It Is– EMERGENCY Last Resort Self Defense 

By last resort, I mean that risk reduction, assault deterring, boundary setting and repelling strategies naturally come first. Now log this tip: To greatly reduce your risks, you must deny two things: PRIVACY & CONTROL.

Translation? As much as realistically possible, don’t allow yourself to become isolated with a would-be attacker/ victimizer/ criminal or predator. (TRUST YOUR GUT HERE!) And do not allow “them” to control your behavior- in other words to lead you where you do NOT want to go or otherwise manipulate your movements against your will.

Remember: Do NOT allow a criminal or would-be rapist to force you into a vehicle or otherwise move your from crime scene A to crime scene B. It will always be to a far more isolated location where it will be more difficult to attract attention or breakaway. This includes NOT allowing an assailant or thug to forcibly move you from the visible jogging trail seen by passing motorists and others into the more desolate woods. Or from the parking lot and front of the building to the remote back of the building. This all constitutes forcible movement from one place to another.

So you may have to go physical with whatever skills you have in order to free yourself.

Even with the best of risk reduction and prevention strategies, it happens – so here’s FIVE basic rules if you must fight back. 

1) Explode and penetrate into your target, do not just give a smack. Explode like a bullet directly into your target, not like a firecracker dispersing energy in all directions at once. 

(2) Technique AND fighting spirit count, so tap and funnel raw animal ferocity.

(3) Focus. Focus. Focus. FORCE it if you must but do not allow your mind to splinter, waver or freeze. Breathing helps!

(4) YELL! It oxygenates the tissues, rallies the fighting spirit and can add as much as 33 % more power to your moves.

(5) OWN you world and use your environment. From utilizing walls and counter-tops to shove off of or slam (him) into, to using blunt and pointy objects as weapons, to wielding trash cans and furniture as shields and barriers. My motto? “WHADDYA GOT?”

When it’s GO TIME, get fierce!  And get cracking!